Executive function activities for kids

What executive functioning skills are: air traffic control for the brain

The term sounds technical, but it describes something you see every day. Executive functions are the skills we use to manage our own thoughts and actions. The Center on the Developing Child at Harvard University compares them to air traffic control at a busy airport: lots of planes want to land and take off at once, and someone has to keep track of all of them (Harvard Center on the Developing Child).

Researchers broadly agree on three core executive functions: working memory, inhibition (holding back impulses and distractions) and cognitive flexibility. Planning, problem-solving and reasoning are built on top of them (Diamond 2013).

For kids, you can put it like this: working memory is the sticky note in your head. The brake stops you before you do something you will regret a second later. And flexibility is the switch that lets you change your mind when the rules change.

The three core skills in everyday family life

All three show up constantly, often at the same time. A few scenes you may recognize:

Sticky note: you ask your child to grab a toothbrush, pajamas and a stuffed animal. They come back with the stuffed animal.
Brake: little brother’s block tower is wobbling so temptingly. Sometimes the hand is faster than the thought.
Switch: you are out of pasta, so it’s rice tonight. For some kids that is no big deal. For others, the world just ended.

The three are closely linked. To change your mind, you have to hold back the old way of seeing things and keep the new one in mind. That is why flexibility builds on the other two and comes in later in development (Diamond 2013).

How executive function develops with age

No child is born with these skills, but every child is born with the potential to build them. The process is slow. It starts in infancy, continues into early adulthood and is shaped by experience (Harvard Center on the Developing Child).

Switching gears shows this well. In a well-known test, children sort cards by color and then by shape. Three-year-olds keep sorting by color after the switch, even though they can tell you the new rule. By around four and a half to five, most children manage that one switch. Switching back and forth flexibly from one trial to the next only comes at around seven to nine (Diamond 2013).

Diamond also describes switching between two tasks as a skill that keeps developing throughout childhood (Diamond 2013).

One example: when your kindergartner melts down over a last-minute change of plans, there may simply be a switch that is still under construction. That doesn’t make the moment easier, but it may make it feel a little less personal.

Cognitive flexibility activities for kids

Cognitive flexibility is the capacity to switch gears and adjust to changing demands, priorities or perspectives (Harvard Center on the Developing Child). Diamond also counts seeing something from someone else’s point of view, finding a new way to solve a problem when the first one doesn’t work and admitting you were wrong (Diamond 2013).

The cognitive flexibility activities here share a simple setup: one rule settles in, then another one takes its place. Here is how that works in these games:

In Wrong Color, you call out a color and your child points not to that color but to the one that goes with it on the card. The obvious answer has to go, the new rule has to come in. There is a printable sheet for it.

In The Opposite Game, your child always does the exact opposite of what you say. Before you start, agree on a few pairs together, like sit and stand or loud and quiet.

In Action Spiral, each color stands for a movement such as clapping or stomping, and your child works through a spiral of colored circles from the outside in. Once that is easy, swap two movements in the middle of a round. The clapping color suddenly means stomping.

Sorting with a rule change: sort buttons, socks or blocks by color, then right away by shape or size. Harvard’s guide for 3- to 5-year-olds names exactly this as practice for flexibility (Harvard, ages 3 to 5).
New uses for old things: the paper towel tube becomes a telescope, the wooden spoon a microphone. The guide counts this kind of pretend play as flexibility practice too.
Card games: in Uno or Crazy Eights, you can match by color or by number, so you keep switching between two options. Harvard’s guide for 5- to 7-year-olds lists these games for flexibility (Harvard, ages 5 to 7).
Guess my rule: you sort blocks by a secret rule and your child guesses it. Then they invent one and you guess.

Start with one fixed rule and only switch once it is solid. The switch is the real exercise, and it is hard for young children. Laugh about mistakes, yours included. You will find more thinking games in logic and thinking.

Inhibition: stop first, then act

Inhibition means briefly stopping an urge or a distraction before acting on it. Classic games for it are stop-and-go and opposite games like Simon Says. What studies show and how to make these games harder step by step is covered in Impulse control games for kids you can play at home.

Working memory: the sticky note in your head

Working memory holds a few things in mind for a short time so your child can work with them. Connect the Colors combines it with planning: your child remembers the connections between dots and rebuilds them on an empty board. More memory games, like Instruction Chain, and everyday tips are in Working memory games for kids and simple everyday tips.

Executive function activities for kids: what research shows

A review of programs for children ages 4 to 12 found gains from very different approaches: computer and non-computer games, martial arts, yoga, mindfulness and school curricula. What they shared was regular practice and demands that kept rising. Children who started out with the most difficulty gained the most (Diamond & Lee 2011).

The authors also note that training these skills on their own is probably not enough. The school programs that showed gains also paid attention to emotions and getting along with others (Diamond & Lee 2011).

The limits matter just as much. A critical review shows that people get better at what they practice, but the improvement transfers only narrowly to similar tasks. Memory training does not automatically make a child more patient or more flexible (Diamond & Ling 2016). Harvard’s activity guide also says openly that not all of its suggestions have been tested in studies yet.

The games here are not such programs and have not been studied. Play them because they are fun and give you time together. We don’t promise that anything changes outside the game, like less dawdling when it’s time to get dressed, and no study can promise that either.

Everyday habits: routines, planning, room for mistakes

Most chances to practice don’t happen during games. They happen between breakfast and brushing teeth. Four habits make room for them without an extra program:

Lean on routines: Diamond describes how much easier it is to run on autopilot than to think through every step (Diamond 2013). One example: what happens the same way every morning doesn’t need new planning, which leaves more time for whatever is different today.
Let your child plan: before playing, your child says or draws what they are going to do. In the preschool program Tools of the Mind, children draw play plans like this so they think first and then act (Harvard, ages 3 to 5).
Allow mistakes: Harvard’s guide describes the adult’s role as helping with hard tasks first, then gradually stepping back so children can manage on their own and learn from their mistakes (Harvard Center on the Developing Child).
Model flexible thinking: say it out loud when you change plans yourself. “We missed the bus. Then we’ll walk and take the path past the playground.”

When to talk to your pediatrician

Children differ a lot in how fast these skills grow. There is no home test that can sort this out reliably, and you won’t find a self-test checklist here, on purpose.

Talk to your pediatrician if something has been on your mind for a while or if your child is unhappy about it. Your pediatrician can refer you to a specialist if needed. If ADHD is on your mind, read Think your child has ADHD? First steps for parents.

Matching exercises

Frequently asked questions

What are the 3 executive functions?

Researchers usually name three core skills: working memory, which holds information in mind; inhibition, which stops impulses and distractions; and cognitive flexibility, which lets you switch gears. Planning, problem-solving and reasoning build on these three (Diamond 2013). In children, all three are still developing and keep growing for many years.

Is there a test for executive functioning skills in kids?

Professionals use standardized tasks in research and evaluations, such as sorting cards by changing rules. There is no reliable test for parents to use at home, and how a child does in a single game tells you very little. If you are worried, start with your pediatrician, who can refer you for a thorough evaluation if needed.

What are good executive function activities for preschoolers?

At this age, anything that asks for rules, waiting and switching in play works well: pretend play with agreed roles, freeze dance, sorting games with a rule change and simple card games. Harvard’s guide for 3- to 5-year-olds describes many such ideas (Harvard, ages 3 to 5). Keep it fun and make it slowly harder.

What are some cognitive flexibility activities for kids?

Look for games where a rule changes: sorting first by color, then by shape, The Opposite Game, Wrong Color, or card games like Uno where you can match by color or number. Start with one fixed rule and only switch once it is solid. The switch itself is the exercise, not the speed.

Executive function activities for kids: a parent’s guide